Social media, for all the world of good it does, it has its cons. And frankly, in my opinion, it has laid the foundation on which the deceit that constitutes the fabric of today’s society resides. Here’s how.
People who use smiley faces when they are not even amused.
Person: Knock Knock
Me: Who’s there?
Person: Hatch
Me: Hatch who?
Person: Bless you!
I sit there and type: ππππππ, you’re so funny, you should be a stand-up comedian, you deserve your own show!
When my actual face is π
People who try to hold two conversations on different social media platforms. First of all, this only works if you’re both irredeemably invested in each other. Otherwise, it’s downright creepy. If she wasn’t into you when you sent a message on WhatsApp, there’s no point sending a message on Facebook messenger, it’s not the App, it’s you!
Individuals who start to date their dream person “in their heads”. If a person hypes all your selfies on your WhatsApp status update and Instagram story without shooting their shot, it’s less out of admiration of you and more because they recognize you’re ugly, sad and unloved. So what they’re doing is a basic civic responsibility to ensure suicide doesn’t cross your mind. Stay beautiful boo.
Those that lie to keep the conversation going. Say stuff like “Do you know thieves just came into my house right now?” Wow, amazing, incredible, sensational, hurrah! So what you’re saying is, rather than protect your hide, you’re busy texting me? Because I’m the police right? My friend, if you don’t leave foolishness alone.
Long Status updates. Some people sew threads with their status updates about completely unrelated things but act surprised when you tell them you’ve muted them. Like honey, there’s no way I’m going through over twenty updates, what happens at the end, I get a medal?
“You forgot me”. Well hello to you too, you do realize if you hit me up first, your finger wouldn’t wither away? If you were so eager to reach out to me or hear my voice, you could as well buy some airtime and do just that. The telephone works both ways.
“No you hang, no you hang up”. Your service provider is somewhere rubbing their palms together at the prospect of all the money they’ll make from you. Carry on, love is sweet.
Unsolicited video calls. You’re in the loo, trying to get the remnants of the “Okpa” you ate in the last quarter out of your system and voila, a contact you barely chat suddenly requests a video call with. First off, we barely talk, second of, I’m in the loo, and why must you see my face?
Friend requests. From personal experience, an individual sent a friend request on Facebook, I didn’t accept, for reasons best known to me. The same individual hopped over to my timeline and posted “Hi, please accept my request”.
I removed the post from my timeline. Later that evening, I’m having a chat with my old boy and he goes “Do you ignore messages sent to you?” Apparently, the aggrieved party had taken the battle to my doorstep. God “save” us.
What more can I say, the world is going to shit and it’s taking us all with it. So the next time you feel the urge to send someone a virtual message, think twice. In the iconic words of musical genius and dead beat sensation…
I’m Good Luv, enjoy!
Β© Gottfried. All rights reserved.
This was really funny, especially when you notice certain almost all of these things have happened
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Haha true
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Sadly, it is true. Human relationships are at risk with social media. The same gesture of scrolling downer swiping can be transferred to relationships. Treating the person like a picture on a smart phone, you can swipe them. Same for WhatsApp, and all the misinterpretation that can follow
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You’re right Maylynno. I’m also guilty. It does take a really conscious effort though. And I’m trying my best too!
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“When my actual face is π” Yes!!!!!!!!!! π :D
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π π π
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Hey, I agree with you and the post was so funny. I like the one lieing one, because it’s most relatable, I have faced that a lotππ Nice post
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Haha. Glad you enjoyed it
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We’ve met our share of weirdos on social media for sure. You write well. :)
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Thank you for your kind words. π
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πππ
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π
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Puoi mettere un traduttore? :-)
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I social media, per tutto il mondo del bene, ha i suoi contro. E francamente, a mio parere, ha gettato le basi su cui risiede l’inganno che costituisce il tessuto della societΓ odierna. Ecco come.
Le persone che usano facce sorridenti quando non sono nemmeno divertite.
Persona: Knock Knock
Io: chi c’Γ¨?
Persona: Hatch
Io: Hatch chi?
Persona: ti benedica!
Mi siedo lΓ¬ e digito: you, sei cosΓ¬ divertente, dovresti essere un cabarettista, ti meriti il ββtuo spettacolo!
Quando la mia faccia attuale Γ¨ π
Persone che cercano di tenere due conversazioni su diverse piattaforme di social media. Prima di tutto, funziona solo se siete entrambi irriducibilmente investiti l’uno nell’altro. Altrimenti, Γ¨ davvero raccapricciante. Se lei non era dentro di te quando hai inviato un messaggio su WhatsApp, non ha senso inviare un messaggio su Facebook Messenger, non Γ¨ l’App, sei tu!
Individui che iniziano ad uscire con la loro persona da sogno “nella loro testa”. Se una persona mette in risalto tutti i tuoi selfie sull’aggiornamento di stato di WhatsApp e la storia di Instagram senza sparare, Γ¨ meno per l’ammirazione di te e di piΓΉ perchΓ© riconosce che sei brutto, triste e non amato. Quindi quello che stanno facendo Γ¨ una responsabilitΓ civica di base per assicurarsi che il suicidio non ti attraversi la mente. Rimani bellissimo fischio.
Quelli che mentono per mantenere la conversazione in corso. DΓ¬ cose come “Sai che i ladri sono appena entrati in casa mia adesso?” Wow, incredibile, incredibile, sensazionale, evviva! Quindi quello che stai dicendo Γ¨, piuttosto che proteggere la tua pelle, sei impegnato a mandarmi messaggi? PerchΓ© io sono la polizia, giusto? Amico mio, se non lasci da solo le sciocchezze.
Aggiornamenti di stato lunghi. Alcune persone cuciono i thread con i loro aggiornamenti di stato su cose completamente indipendenti ma agiscono sorpresi quando gli dici che li hai disattivati. Come il miele, non ho modo di superare piΓΉ di venti aggiornamenti, cosa succede alla fine, ottengo una medaglia?
“Ti sei dimenticato di me”. Bene ciao anche a te, ti rendi conto che se mi picchi per primo, il tuo dito non appassirΓ ? Se fossi cosΓ¬ desideroso di contattarmi o di ascoltare la mia voce, potresti anche comprare un po ‘di tempo libero e fare proprio quello. Il telefono funziona in entrambe le direzioni.
“No, impiccati, non appendi”. Il tuo fornitore di servizi Γ¨ da qualche parte strofinando i palmi insieme alla prospettiva di tutti i soldi che faranno da te. Continua, l’amore Γ¨ dolce.
Videochiamate non richieste. Sei nel bagno, cercando di ottenere i resti di “Okpa” che hai mangiato nell’ultimo trimestre fuori dal tuo sistema e voilΓ , un contatto che chiami a malapena all’improvviso richiede una videochiamata con. Prima di tutto, parliamo a malapena, secondo, sono in bagno, e perchΓ© devi vedere la mia faccia?
Richieste di amicizia. Per esperienza personale, una persona ha inviato una richiesta di amicizia su Facebook, non ho accettato, per le ragioni che mi sono piΓΉ note. Lo stesso individuo Γ¨ saltato sulla mia timeline e ha pubblicato “Ciao, accetta la mia richiesta”.
Ho rimosso il post dalla mia timeline. PiΓΉ tardi quella sera, sto facendo una chiacchierata con il mio vecchio ragazzo e lui dice “Ignori i messaggi che ti sono stati mandati?” Apparentemente, la parte lesa aveva portato la battaglia alla mia porta di casa. Dio ci salvi.
Cos’altro posso dire, il mondo sta per cagare e ci sta portando tutto con sΓ©. Quindi la prossima volta che senti l’impulso di inviare a qualcuno un messaggio virtuale, pensaci due volte. Nelle parole iconiche del genio musicale e della sensazione di beat morte …
Sono un buon Luv, divertiti!
Gottfried
Β
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“If she wasnβt into you when you sent a message onΒ WhatsApp, thereβs no point sending a message onΒ Facebook messenger,Β itβs not the App, itβs you!” This made me laugh hardππ
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ππππ
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So very true! especially the emoji thing… And I am so glad I am married!!! Gonna go hug my husband and have a real conversation….
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Haha lovelyπ
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Well I have to say I agree with you about the emoji use. Sometimes I go to my keyboard and make my own from fmsymbols. I really do like flowers and hearts but I don’t use them with everyone. Some people take them wrong LOL [laughing face]. You cracked me up with the friend request one. Love your shares :) (β‘βΏβ‘βΏ) :) :)
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Thank you. Love the fact that you enjoyed my post. Now I’ll always be looking out for your comments.π
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Oh I do. I really love to read short posts. I like what you said about those that write an opus, my brain gets tired and it’s hard to track long ones. I be watching for you as well :) Have a super day! :)
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I wish you the same. π
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when someone buys a car that gets “virtually” 40 miles to the gallon…they shouldn’t be upset that it “really” gets 35. Virtual is the preferred word for swindlers everywhere. Anyway, thanx for the follow…Barking shall always strive to anger, amuse, inform and always be interesting. continue…
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Thank you for the follow. Appreciate the comment more. π
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I so much can relate especially the you forgot me part. Like Nigga r u kidding me
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Haha.
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The only issh I’ve got to interfere is friend requests
I end up adding them and unfriending them after days.
Lol!
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Haha evilππ
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Social media is like giving oneself a dream brand.. To many deceitful Emojis..
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πππ
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So relatable π
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π π
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Opinion of personal realities is a social form of freedom, (real? Unreal?) everything is relative, extremism is the problem, not conscious use!
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I agree π
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π€π
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π π π
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I remember a middle school student asking if he would be able to find me (his teacher) on Facebook. I wonder if he is still looking because I have never been there.
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Haha ππππ
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very true, relatable, and funny!
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Thank you π
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It is definitely NOT a good way to have an argument
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At all π
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Social media is a godsend when you can’t get out much (for one reason or another). I also became quite addicted when I was between husbands – a good way to team up with local singles to hit the over-30 clubs together. Now it’s a great way to communicate with the kids – none live nearby and one is in New Zealand
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Thanks for sharing Cathy. Different strokesπ
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I remember playing with MySpace and getting bored. I never thought I needed FakeBook until it was demanded of me for a HS reunion. 20+ crazy a$$holes later, I walked away from that asylum. I don’t care what you had for lunch.
I had a Twitter account that I never used. It sat with two tweets for eight years. I finally closed it.
No Instagram. No WhatsApp. No Snapchat. I have an account with Minds that sits.
I’m an old programmer from the 80s. I never wanted to swim in it. I like some anonymity.
I actually had an ex tell me that he thought computers & the Internet was a fad. π
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Haha the last bit is absolutely hilarious πππ
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He was a weird one.
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Indeedπ
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You nailed the βyou forgot meβ point, hahaha.
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Haha honestly it’s baffling when people say it. Like what?
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Exactly. Like you had equal chance to reach out. Itβs not a one-sided contest, sigh.
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It’s really notπ
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I refuse to say anything π€π€
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Haha
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It is so relatable and funny
Well done
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Thank youπ
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Uwlc dear
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π
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I think the problem is that so many people think that online is real life.
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You’re correct
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Okay… Now I know you have a problem with social media but you don’t need to be personal about.. Let other people who uses it get some breathing space… Abegπ
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Haha I enjoy social media as much as the next personπ
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