The Weight Of Expectation

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When you stop expecting people to be perfect, you can like them for who they are. Sometimes I wonder if I’m nothing more than the sum of who [my parents] were. I like to imagine I took only their excellent character traits and left out all the excesses, but as time continues to pass, I realize I may have not been paying attention.

These days I’ve evolved. Look. I have a strategy. Why expect anything? If you don’t expect anything, you don’t get disappointed. My expectations were reduced to zero when I was 21. Everything since then has been a bonus. 10/10 would definitely recommend it.

Pregnancy. I understand that you’re expecting a baby but is that really an excuse to ask for lamb chops at 2 am? Who made the request, you or the baby? Fellas we need to stop these women from harassing us.

This one time I was at the hospital and this dude walks up to a pregnant woman and goes, “what are you pregnant for?” Her response is gold. She goes, “hopefully it turns out to be a human baby but if it’s a turtle, I’ll take it” I let out a howl!

The job seeker. Employers want fresh graduates who graduated cum laude, are below 24 years, with five years’ experience in the relevant field? Is it crack?

It doesn’t help that the mail you sent to your recruiter says “find attached a copy of my Cover letter and Resumé” but neither are attached. But let’s blame the internet service providers or the henny?

The farmer. So you just planted crops. It spans an expanse of land. You spend every waking moment plotting what will be done with the proceeds you’ll make. Wedding plans are set in motion. Money really is the best perfume, it’s no longer an uphill task to find “the one”, right?

The spinster. Your farmer fiance is finally doing right by you. Wedding plans are going well. Then lightning strikes twice and rain washes away his crops. Do you go ahead with the wedding? Surely you’re not calling it off for that minor setback. The wedding guests will have to make do with small chops, okay?

The student. Being a medical student has taken its toll on you. Holding your breath before every result comes out. You must not disgrace the family. You’re the one child everyone expects to succeed but you suddenly start second-guessing yourself. Is medicine really your passion?

Parenting. Over a decade worth of school fees. This son, I beg your pardon, investment, this investment has to pay off. But it’s all good, you’re about to be called the father of a doctor. Bragging rights will be off the charts. Then you receive a curious call.

“Hello Dad”

“Call me Papa Doctor!”

“Yeah about that…so Dad, I’ve been thinking. I don’t think medicine is my passion”

“Speak up, what did you say?”

“Dad, I don’t want to become a medical doctor anymore!”

“My son, you just discovered this now?”

“Yes dad”

“So my boy what do you want to do with your life?”

“Ballet”

“Dad….dad?!!!”

He’s fainted! He gets resuscitated and started sobbing uncontrollably. Doctor Dolittle

I’ve been trying to keep up with all these great expectations, so I keep on faking. But you know the truth? We’re all secretly out of control and nobody knows it. Positive expectations are the mark of the superior personality but not everyone is superior or has a personality, to begin with.

To wish was to hope, and to hope was to expect. But know this, you are your own worst enemy. If you can learn to stop expecting impossible perfection, in yourself and others, you may find the happiness that has always eluded you. And more importantly, always know that everything is in perfect order…

whether you understand it or not.

© Gottfried. All rights reserved.

122 comments

  1. I didn’t want a turtle… I wanted a puppy :P ;)
    Love this! Great expectations are great… and achievable… when we concede that no one is perfect! Not even me – *feigns shocked horror*.
    In actual fact, I do perfectly imperfect… um… perfectly! ;)

    Liked by 1 person

      1. No… but like… I actually dreamed about the birth when I was pregnant… and I gave birth to a puppy!!! My kids loved it when I told them the story…. and when they frustrate me, they like to throw in, ‘bet you wish right now more than ever that I HAD been a puppy, right?’ :P

        Liked by 1 person

  2. First … I love the pregnant woman’s comeback!!! Priceless! And second, “you are your own worst enemy. If you can learn to stop expecting impossible perfection, in yourself and others, you may find the happiness …” are perhaps among the wisest words I’ve heard in a long time. I think we all need to print those words and put them on the bathroom mirror so that we see them multiple times each day. Good job!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. This job expectation is really on another level, i know how many job ads i have seen and applied for, even the ones i don’t qualify i do apply hoping for a miracle you know, but it all good cuz i have reduce my level of expectations to avoid heart break.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Hahaha! We all need to lower our expectations. Lord knows I need to. How about zero expectations? No one can expect much at that point! 😂
    I love the last bit. Very insightful and meaningful. Excellent post. 👌

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Excellent piece… It’s pointless raising your expectations on people… They can fail… It’s better to keep an open mind always… And I loved the Jon Bellion reference… Smart writer.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Over the years, i have embraced the beauty of not expecting anything from anyone. Applying for jobs further strengthened that mentality. I applied for jobs and never expected to receive emails about an interview,and guess what???…Zero interviews, a thousand applications 😂😂😂

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Having expectations really is a weight. You don’t feel it until it drops on you. Expectations and its twin, “Entitlement” have proven to be the root cause of disappointment. Funnily, somehow, remotely, we still have bits of expectations from people, even when we know the consequences if unmet.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Having expectations really is a weight. You don’t feel it until it drops on you. Expectations and its twin, “Entitlement” have proven to be the root cause of disappointment. Funnily, somehow, remotely, we still have bits of expectations from people even when we know the consequences of unmet.

    Liked by 2 people

  9. I learned this lesson a long time ago. People are prone to disappoint you and you’re susceptible to disappointment because you had expectations.
    It’s better they surpass the non-existent expectations than they fault short of the highly unrealistic expectations.

    For ourselves, we should learn to set realistic goals, start from the little things like doing the laundry or making coffee before you say you want to top
    Warren Buffet.

    Many suicides have been due to unmet expectations.

    Liked by 3 people

  10. This is brilliant and humorous as ever.
    I had a conversation similar to this with my friend ‘Kay’ some hours back and how we needed to cut short expectations (definitely from people) as the only liable alternative to level headed sanity.
    It’s crazy but we developed a theory called the super hero theory that allows us to this. lol

    Liked by 2 people

  11. Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.
    But as a parent, are you supposed to give up expectations on your kids? I’m sure parents can’t relate.

    Liked by 2 people

  12. Beauty in imperfection because no one is really perfect not even you.

    I don’t expect much from people because I don’t want them to do same for me(I’m human) so I really don’t get disappointed when things don’t work out with them as envisioned.

    Liked by 2 people

  13. Now, imagine…
    – Going to school expecting to get the papers at the end, and then you hear, “Hey! We’ve stopped giving certificates”
    – Going to work everyday expecting salary at the end of the month, and then they say “No salary this month, let’s start next month already”

    But yeah, I agree, we need to stop expecting impossible perfections, that way, whatever the outcome, we’re good, after all we didn’t expect more!

    Great article!

    Liked by 2 people

  14. ”Expecting impossible perfection”

    we were actually taught to have extremely high expectations of ourselves but right now, I don’t know.

    ”Job seekers”: I’m so applying for all, that 3-5years experience is their own and I cannot be discouraged, I’m gon’ try my luck. We never can tell.

    I think when I’m pregnant, I’ll be like that too, craving everything😋

    Liked by 2 people

  15. Expectations of impossible perfection! I’m holding on to this.
    The weight of expectations doesn’t permit one to live fully and on the other, curb your actions (discipline) and it’s key. Sometimes I simply care less but when the pangs (of falling short) suddenly hit on me!

    Nicely done Guy. Thanks for Mondays.

    Liked by 2 people

  16. “When you stop expecting people to be perfect, you can like them for who they are.” Facts on facts, you have to see the beauty in their imperfections . One might not have the same threshold they had when they were in their early twenties.
    A freshly graduate with five years work experience, it’s definitely crack. But you still have to submit your resume and cover letter because regardless of what the requirements states you must sell your market and shoot your shot.

    Nice post mister!!

    Liked by 3 people

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