Music is an organized sound that is pleasant to the ears. Once it stops being organized, you’ve transitioned from music to noise making. Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth. Then it just becomes a soap opera. It’s not too late for to go back to … Continue reading The Best Music Taste

At birth , rather than be addressed as only a day old, why aren’t you nine months old? Or ten depending on how long your mother was pregnant for. Doesn’t this make much more sense or is it because we’re just too lazy to calculate the days? Instead of birth-day, we’ll have conception day. Of … Continue reading Born Again

Remember when people had diaries and got mad when someone read them? Now they put everything online and get mad when people don’t. You can’t cheer stupid but you can sedate it. Healing doesn’t mean the damage never existed. It means the damage no longer controls our lives. That being said, I’m staying home today, … Continue reading Finding the Cure

After one look at this planet any visitor from outer space would say “I want to see the manager.” Honey, if you need any more space, you have to join NASA. I must admit it. Maybe I’m a piece of history after all; occupying a space in your mind. The only thing that scares me … Continue reading Running out of Space

Watching me while a poop is a special kind of intimacy and a healthy bond that should exist between partners. Farting around each other is the key to spicing up your relationship. One whiff of her fart and you’re ready to redo your vows. Helps with communication too. I eat poop when no one is … Continue reading Taking a Dump