You can fool yourself, you know. You'd think it's impossible, but it turns out it's the easiest thing of all. If you lie to yourself, you're being delusional. If you cannot accept the truth and think to yourself otherwise, you're in self-denial. Now look, if you repeat a lie you said to yourself to someone … Continue reading Lies We Tell Ourselves

One thing I've learned in the rainy seasons I've been on this side of eternity is this. Just when you think it's all going great, something is around the corner to remind you of the uncertainties of life. Having a great week? Your car will start acting up. It's your birth month? Chickenpox. Football season … Continue reading On The Highway Of Life

God made woman beautiful and foolish. Beautiful, that man might love her. Foolish, that she might love him. True Love. Love that doesn't turn you stupid, is no love. The brain becomes illogical, in the throes of a new romance. People in 'blind love' throw away common sense, conscience, and comedy from their life. It … Continue reading The Shenanigans Of Love

Purists will come at me arguing that 'hate' is such a strong word, you should use something mild like 'dislike'. First of all, nobody asked you! Get a grip! Haha, I'm just joking. Or am I? Anyways, here are a few things I absolutely 'hate'. I hate smart mouth kids. You know those kids that … Continue reading I Hate

I'm starting to get to that age where I can't jokingly promise marriage. Be messing around and ask her to marry me, next thing you know, she's sewn a wedding gown in her head. Even going as far as picking our wedding colors and kids' names. Talking about 'Gottfried honey, I think you'll look good … Continue reading The Way To A Woman’s Heart

You never quite think certain things will ever happen to you. Right up until they do. It never crossed your mind that you could shit yourself, till the robber cocked the gun and aimed it at you. You smiled at her and asked her to be your wife. And she went on to say yes! … Continue reading The Chicken Pox Episode

My Sweet Valentine. I write to you with a heart full of love and a belly full of soda. If I had only one smile in me, I'd give it to you. Where there is great love, there are always wishes because, Love, is our true destiny. We do not find the meaning of life … Continue reading The Hoax That Is Valentine

When you stop expecting people to be perfect, you can like them for who they are. Sometimes I wonder if I'm nothing more than the sum of who [my parents] were. I like to imagine I took only their excellent character traits and left out all the excesses, but as time continues to pass, I … Continue reading The Weight Of Expectation

I find it really convenient that people will rather pretend it doesn't happen than discuss a phenomenon that persists with us every day. Dread it, run from it, we all fart! When you eat, your body produces gas as part of breaking down and processing food. Fact! But people, take note, there's a difference between … Continue reading The Health Benefits Of Farting

Birthdays shouldn't be celebrated! If anything, birthdays are a rude awakening to the fact that you're inching ever so closer to death. I also think all this talk about age is foolish. Every time I’m one year older, everyone else is too. But folks choose to celebrate and I think maybe there's something to celebrate … Continue reading The Mirage Of Birthdays