A happy marriage is a long conversation that always seems too short. If you find yourself in endless conversations with your partner that never quite end, you did get it right. Unless she's deaf and you can't be too arsed to learn sign language. The happiest marriage I can picture would be a union of … Continue reading Happily Married

It started with Envy. For Envy, when you can't have one, pissing people off who do is the next best thing. Of the seven deadly sins, only envy is no fun at all. Envy is the art of counting the other fellow's blessings instead of your own. It is the character of very few men to … Continue reading The Deadliest Sin

We were young. It was a good time. She was adorable and sweet, I was up to no good. Oil and water don’t mix but I somehow made it happen. Now we’re seated in the kids' church, it’s time for prayers so everyone stands up. Unprovoked, I remove her chair from behind her back, without … Continue reading My First Love

Sometimes the first step to forgiveness is understanding the other person is a complete idiot. Individuals might forgive, companies don't. To err is human, to forgive is against company policy. I forgive a lot, but I only trust once. If you break my trust, that's it. Once a woman has forgiven her man, she must … Continue reading Forgiving

I'm not lost. To be lost, you have to know where it is you're supposed to be. And I don't even know that. Lose weight? Try dieting. I've been on a diet for two weeks and all I've lost is 14 days. The first thing you lose on a diet is your humor. You might … Continue reading Are you Lost