No Vacancy

~ Gottfried

A man who marries his mistress creates a vacancy for that role. I find it bizarre when former mistresses now wives complain about the entrance of a new mistress. This is literally how you got your promotion, stop being a hater.

My career plans were much more exciting when I was five. You’re only allowed to be busy if you’re planning towards retirement. Never get so busy making a living that you forget to make a life. I don’t even know what that means but it sounded fancy so I typed it out.

I like work, it fascinates me; I sit and look at it for hours. The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one. Nothing sends your heart spiraling like going on a job site and seeing your organization advertising the role you currently occupy. You just know you’re getting a promotion.

Sometimes the best part of the job is a chair that swivels. Don’t pick a job with great vacation time. Pick one that doesn’t need escaping from. If only you could see how small a vacancy your death will leave, you would think less of the place you occupy in your lifetime.

Ensure that your head is empty at all times. It’s what helps you be at peace. Don’t let negative people rent a space in your head. Raise the rent and kick them out! Luck is a dividend of sweat. The more you sweat, the luckier you get. The only thing that has ever sat its way to success is a hen.

Vacancy in my heart for a true friend. Eligible candidates must be loving, caring and kind. Your duty is to love me, even until death. Experience is not required. Your salary will be my never ending love. You must be willing to start immediately. Are you interested?

Send in your résumé

©️ Gottfried. All rights reserved

80 thoughts on “No Vacancy”

  2. HAha my ‘Hotel Florida’ Has Many Rooms
    Mr Gottfried Even More Than ‘Hotel California’
    Where ‘the Eagles’ Tried To Kill ‘The Beast’ it Goes
    Something Like ‘This’ A Classic From Last Century indeed

    “Mirrors on the ceiling
    The pink champagne on ice
    And she said, ‘We are all just prisoners here
    Of our own device”

    And in the master’s chambers
    They gathered for the feast
    They stab it with their steely knives
    But they just can’t kill the beast

    Last thing I remember, I was
    Running for the door
    I had to find the passage back
    To the place I was before

    “Relax, ” said the night man
    “We are programmed to receive
    You can check out any time you like
    But you can never leave.”

    And Indeed my FRiEnD The Story of Humanity
    Becoming More THEiR Tools Than Human Lost in

    A 6 Inch Screen No Way to Kill the ‘Idol Beast’
    That Replaces Human SPIRiT HeART SoUL Naked
    Enough Whole
    Complete Moving
    Connecting Co-Creating
    Yes Dancing Singing Free
    Yet You See that’s “Hotel
    California” Now i’m Close to
    The East Coast in the Western
    LA Panhandle of Florida ‘Affectionately’
    Also Known as ‘Lower Alabama’ Not Exactly
    Known for Progress Yet the ‘Redneck Riviera’
    Also Known as the Emerald Gulf Coast Does

    Attract Lots of Rich Folks All Around the World
    Yet Money And Tools is No Part oF All the Vacancies
    That My ‘Hotel Florida’ Provides As It is the Rooms of
    SMiLes i Give Away For Free Like Today Entertaining
    SMiLes of Literally Thousands of Folks in A 7 Hour Solid
    Free Dance All Around the Public Stores of this Metro Area Did

    i Mention
    my Wife Loves
    to Shop True A
    Given For Hunters
    And Gatherers of Woman
    Hood to be Expected of course hehe

    Shoes Shoes Shoes So Many Stores With
    Shoes Shoes Shoes Every Color Kind and
    Style Yet i Dance Dance Dance After Entertaining
    The Church With Song Song Song RiSinG SPiRiTS
    iN Every Pew i Pass on the Way to Communion
    And In the Back Pew as Soul Song Carries Far

    And Dance Soul too in a Balance FRiEnDS
    With Gravity As Peace ThiS Way Generates BaLaNCinG
    Endless Effortless Ease in Wu Wei Chi Positive LoVE ENeRGies

    It’s True A Young Woman Cashier Last Night Challenged me to A Dance
    Off Already Reported to Another FRiEnD She Succumbed That i Won
    After About 5 Minutes of Getting Dizzy Spiraling Sick Catching up to
    The Good Cop Version of the ‘Tasmanian Devil’ Hehe and Here i am Again

    As Loyal As CLocK
    Work Yet Look
    Ma And Pa

    No Hands

    Just Fingers Dancing
    STill as Legs ACRoSS THiS Keyboard

    i Have No Idea Where i’m Going NeWLY NoW
    All i Know Feel and Sense is EveryWHere is LoVE iN Peace HoMe

    With Plenty More Rooms of SMiLes and Other ‘Stuff’ To Give Away…

    Including One More Verse of Hotel California:

    “She got a lot of pretty, pretty boys
    That she calls friends
    How they dance in the courtyard
    Sweet summer sweat
    Some dance to remember
    Some dance to forget”

    My Wife Says One is
    Way too Much Already

    And Although the Women (Literally Thousands As
    Fully Photographed) From the Biggest Metro Dance
    Hall 6 Years in 298 Dance Events on Thursday College
    Nights With Spring Breaks And All of that Never Minded
    Providing Sweaty Dancing Hugs Nope She Says Hell No Not
    Till i Hose You Down HAha Anyway God At Least i Don’t Sleep

    in The Dog House

    Fortunately
    i Guess As We
    Don’t Have a Dog Hehe..:)

    Liked by 2 people

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      1. “Florida resort sounds like
        the start of a box Office horror comedy”
        Indeed Mr Gottfried Florida is the Home of

        ‘Florida Men’ Per Example of Gaetz And
        DeSaTaNiS Who All Wanna
        Be Mini-me Trumps
        In Another Chapter
        of the ‘Minions’ Yet Actually

        It’s More Like A Place

        Too Where Politics Makes
        A Parody Out of Christianity
        At Least the Version That Has
        A Requirement to Feed The Hungry
        And Clothe The Poor As Well No Matter

        Where They Come From Next At Least
        in the Good Cop Jesus Parts

        oF A New Testament

        As Such Particularly
        A Viable Option Until Toward
        the End of Matthew Yes Where
        the ‘J Man’ Says If You Don’t Feed
        And Clothe the Poor and Homeless

        Ya Get Changed From Once Loyal

        Do Gooding Christian Sheep to Goats

        Who Are Burned Forever Forever in ‘Silence
        of the Lambs’ OH NO Per the Mr Hyde Version
        of ‘Dr Jekyll Jesus’ Who Just Said in the Earlier
        Parts of Matthew the Meek Inherit The Earth
        Turn The Other Cheek Love The Enemy As God

        And
        FRiEnD
        The Same

        Oh Dear Lord The Scales
        Are Falling Away From my
        EYes Oh No! This Means
        There is Parody of

        Christianity
        Even at the
        End of Matthew too

        As All Forgiving Merciful
        IF With Character Integrity
        Honor And Honesty Yes in

        Loyalty of Truth to What One Says
        First Stays The Truth And Doesn’t Change
        to Falsehood of LoVE iN Peace Enduring

        For All
        Sinner
        And Saint
        The Same

        Basically All
        Slobs Faces of
        God Anyway as With
        Perfection God Would Be
        A Machine And Elon Musk
        Has Already Warned Us About God’s As Machines

        i Have a Few Vacancies to Fill in A Book i’m Writing

        It’s All
        Volunteer
        Though hehe..:)

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply

  4. We think we leave lasting longing when we leave a role.
    If the role remains vacant just a wee little bit longer than preferred, the longing is about the stress someone else has to go through to do the extra job.
    Relief comes when that role is filled. If you die, the one minute silence won’t be complete before your role is advertised.
    Sad reality tho 😕

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  9. “Never get so busy making a living that you forget to make a life”… I think you probably meant we should be able to balance both social life and work activities together…we should have time for ourselves too…life is all about enjoying experiences and working to earn a living Is also important so we should be able to balance it.

    Thanks for sharing🥰

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

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