The true meaning of Christmas

It’s beginning to cost a lot like Christmas. Christmas is a magical time of the year…I watched all my money magically disappear. Christmas sweaters are only acceptable as a cry for help. Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year. 

Christmas is a baby shower that went completely overboard. My mother-in-law has come round to our house at Christmas seven years running. This year, we’re having a change. We’re going to let her in. I’ll admit , we’re still feeling a bit nervous. 

The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loudly. Nothing more Christmassy than a bellowed hymn. I’ve learned you can tell a lot about a person by the way he handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights. 

Nothing’s as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas. What I like most about Christmas is that it’s compulsory, like a thunderstorm and we all go through it together. Aren’t we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas. You know, the birth of Santa?

The office Christmas party is a great opportunity to catch up with people you haven’t seen for 20 minutes. What I don’t like about office Christmas parties is looking for a new job the next day. After having drinks with the boss, it could be a promotion or termination. 

Of course Santa is dead. You force a guy to eat a billion cookies in one night, what did you think is going to happen?  I love Christmas. I receive a lot of wonderful presents I can’t wait to exchange. That being said, who wants a blender in exchange for a microwave?

Christmas isn’t a season, it’s a feeling. 

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