We’re All A Little Crazy

~ Gottfried

We all exist in our own personal reality of craziness. Indeed sanity is a less severe form of insanity. But, of course, there are those who throw you into a dilemma as to whether they are crazy or just plain stupid. Case in point, running out of the bathroom naked? What is this exercise intended to achieve? Do you lose points if you get seen? Does the audience get extra marks if you slip and fall? Help? Anyone?

One person’s craziness is another person’s reality. If you’ve lived with someone messy, this is most likely the case. You look at the entire room and it’s an absolute mess, but to this psycho, it represents a safe haven. Bizzare

Gottfried: Do you have any plans of cleaning this room man?

David: No, why?

Gottfried: Well, there’s a rat nibbling what was left of your groceries in a corner for starters…

David: Oh, that’s just Peter, he loves doing that

Gottfried: YOU NAMED THE RAT???

When people go “call me crazy or don’t it look like blah blah is blah blah”. Yes, Felicia, you’re crazy! No! nothing looks like anything you just described. But it does stem from overthinking. Overthinking is the leading cause of unhappiness. You do permutations and combinations up until you hear a loud bang, and that’s a nut gone loose upstairs. From there on out, you’re free! And maybe a little crazy. That need to go out to an open field and SCREAM? Exercise it.

When you’re newly in love, which I describe as another form of foolishness, you are totally oblivious to the crazy. Now you’ve just made a little discovery. She’s a little bit crazy. And just when you think you’ve reached the bottom of her craziness, there’s a crazy underground garage. Before you set me on my way to see my shrink, why did you even bother coming? Hysterical

Gottfried: I don’t appreciate you talking very loudly over the phone.

Her: So you don’t like talking to me?

Gottfried: That’s not what I said

Her: It seems you have a problem with people calling you! So I’m loud?

Gottfried: Yes…

Her: SO I SHOULD LOWER MY VOICE BECAUSE I WANT TO TALK TO YOU? WHO ARE YOU? HOW MUCH DO YOU HAVE?

Gottfried: …

Her: NO OH, YOU MUST ANSWER ME TODAY! EVERYBODY COME AND SEE OOH!!!

When you’re the only sane person, you look like the only insane person. So I hear a loud bang, and trust black people, everybody takes off. People are running in different directions seemingly to save their lives. Everyone but me is running. I’m crouched in a corner, thinking about my next move. Jokes, I can’t actually run, I just crouched there to wait for death. But guess who died and/or got injured? People.

When you’re trying to contain your craziness but the lid keeps popping off. So I stepped on you (by accident), jokes, I one hundred percent saw your leg. But I did the common courtesy thing that our elders taught us and apologized. Now you shoved me in the chest and for the last two minutes, you’ve been asking me to hit you if I’m man enough? Let’s just say the only reason I’m hitting you is to shut your crazy ass up for a bit. Social service.

Here’s one you’ll like to keep in mind. Accept the craziness, life will be a bore without it. Unless of course, it keeps nagging. Then you have no choice but to take it outside…

And shoot it.

Β© Gottfried. All rights reserved.

240 thoughts on “We’re All A Little Crazy”

  3. This might be crazy but I don’t actually own clothing. Remember my lost cult? Well… I started a new one (kind of) we are a nudist colony.
    In our sect you get 0 points for wearing clothes and talking REALLY LOUD.
    Everyone else sits naked and in silence.
    Of course, as the leader I wear an ornate robe of fresh flowers woven daily and I address my people all the time. Offering long sermons of profound ridiculousness. Oddly enough I have to talk REALLY LOUD so the ones in the back can hear.
    I guess that awards me 0 points by my own standards that I hold over others but not over myself.
    The jokes on them!
    But what do you expect from a bunch of crazies?!

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  6. So I hear a loud bang, and trust black people, everybody takes off.

    No question about this one, πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚You run first then ask why later!

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          1. There’s a running joke over here. That people from the coast are more likely to die from a bomb blast than people from the rift Valley. Most athletes come from the rift. And coastal communities are generally too laid back, and lazy? So they’d start calling each other to come see the bomb and it’d explode on them, while the rift people would be on the other end of the country in a couple of seconds πŸ˜‚, the joke is funnier in swahili

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