The Deserter

~ Gottfried

I heard a loud bang. I jolted awake. I was in the trench and bullets were flying above my head. It was mayhem. Bodies were dropping all around me, cries of the wounded. Yes, your leg got blown up, but is that an excuse to scream like a little girl? I felt a tap on my shoulder, I looked up, it was Cap. He screamed at me to get out! So I jumped out of the trench and followed him. We were deserting. Thinking back, I have no idea why I decided to sign up for the army. I thought it was going to be all about dressing up and wooing the ladies. Nobody told me we would be going to war?

As we escape from the bushes, we get to a creek. There in a heap were the bodies of soldiers and civilians alike. Without hesitation, Cap ripped off his uniform and gestured at me to do the same. Never liked the gear anyway, trousers getting stuck between my butt cheeks.We were going to wear the clothes of dead men. Some were already decomposing. Eventually, I found one that fit, poor guy had shit himself after getting shot. But it was about survival and I wasn’t going to let something as little as the smell of feaces stop me from staying alive. We kept moving. Stopping meant death.

After hours and hours of trekking in the thick forest, I was fatigued. So I found shade and lay down. Cap took a look at me and asked if I was hungry. Such a stupid question. He knew damn well that I was hungry and tired. I said yes though. Andrenaline could only take me so far. So we went out in search of food. After hours of futile search, I was ready to eat anything. Even Cap started to look tasty. As I was still contemplating it, an unsuspecting lizard was casually strolling by. Without thinking, I reached out, caught it and took a bite. Biting was the easy part, swallowing took more bravery. In case you’re wondering yes, it tasted like chicken.

The forest is thick and scary. Evil lurking at every turn. Cap is walking ahead of me. Suddenly he stops and signals me to do the same. He turns to me and his eyes widen. He screams at me, “Look out!”. I turn around just in time to see a hyena charging at me. It lunges at me and takes a chunk out of my left arm. Cap charges at it, pushing it away from me and they face off. As they have a go at each other, rolling and hitting themselves. They land on a patch of grass and I hear a familiar sound. In seconds, they are both blown up into smithereens. Then it hit me, we were in a minefield. Could this day get any worse? I follow a trail to a cave and lie there, mourn Cap and wait for death.

The next morning I woke up bleeding, bruised, and staring down at the barrel of a gun. Had no idea a hyena could work a gun. Oh it’s just some neigbourhood bandits. I am led out with my hands behind my back as I joined a much larger group. The bandits weren’t on the uniform so I suspect they were a regular terrorist group. What they had in store for me was yet to be seen. Before long we were all blindfolded, and then it started. From a distance I heard a man say his last words, followed by a loud bang and his body dropped to the ground. The end had come. I immediately felt nauseous, the lizard hadn’t done me any favors.

One by one, bodies were dropping. And it was edging closer and closer to my turn. I tried to have a conversation with the big man. I needed a sign that this wasn’t the end. But how was I supposed to escape? Chances were looking really slim. It got to the turn of the person next to me. I think it was a woman because when she was asked for her last words, she screamed, ‘You all will rot in hell!’. In my head, I’m like, “What hell? We’re already here!”. For what seemed like an eternity I held my breath and then it came. A loud bang and she dropped to the ground and rolled into what I suspect to be a hole.

Now being the protagonist of this story, I don’t particularly think I should die yet. I didn’t survive all of that to be unceremoniously executed. But I’m kinda conflicted because I hate a happy ending. What should I do with this character? Give myself super powers? Should I have martial art skills? Yeah I know my hands are tied behind my back but Jet Li and Jackie Chan always seemed to pull it off in the movies. Should I be rescued by the calvary? Maybe not. So let’s say I die, what would be my choice of last words? Help me out here!

Only the dead have seen the end of war

© Gottfried. All rights reserved

414 thoughts on “The Deserter”

  9. so wait, were you in the army or did you make all of this up.
    and now your wife is swooning you after all the missed action…. only bullets, lizards and hyena’s…oh my!!! I hate gory stories without some humor and NO!!!! Wait and you curtail this here. lol!
    Of course you can’t die…well, unless some of your readers kill you off first ha.. but they love you too much.

    Liked by 5 people

    Reply

  10. I had to be sure I was still reading your blog post. Cos what! Such tragedy. But the end has your signature all over it. So typical.

    You’re definitely not dying btw, so this is what will happen, tell them a joke. Give it your best shot, they won’t see it coming. They could keep you around as their jester.

    And on the flip side, if it doesn’t work, say “I’ll go with a big grin on my face” then smile. Even if you’re shitting your pant already.
    You can’t go to the afterlife looking unprepared. You have a reputation to keep.

    Next story, well done Moh.

    Liked by 7 people

    Reply

Leave a reply to Ezeh Chidiebele Cancel reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.