Having A Bad Day

There are days I cannot take part in life. The supply of available curse words is insufficient to meet my demands. If you’re having a bad day, remember that Ronald Wayne in 1976 sold his 10% stake in Apple for $800. Today it is worth over $58 billion. Patience is the calm acceptance that things can happen in a different order than the one you have in mind. For every lost opportunity, I find solace knowing that some people marry prison pen pals. Confirming that my life choices aren’t all that bad.

If you’re having a bad day, smile. Your brain will think you’re happy and it will give you the boost you need to get through the day. Don’t worry if you’re having a bad day. Remember that there are people with tattoed names of ex’s they no longer talk to. If you’re one of such people and you’re having a bad day, you might as well end it. Or go camping. A bad day camping is much better than a good day working.

Dear life. When I asked if my day could get any worse, it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge. I would never challenge you, I’ve seen your work, it ain’t pretty. God gives us only what we can handle. I bet he thinks I’m a bad-ass because what is all this? Why is my side mirror on the road? Also remember that despite your bad day, some adults still wear braces. Take a deep breath. It’s only a bad day, not a bad life. Unless…

Bad day? Stop, take a deep breath, and scream at the top of your lungs till everyone thinks you’re batshit crazy. The look on their bewildered faces should brighten your day. Anyone can have a good day. The question is what you do on a bad day. That’s when you’re tested. In a very tangible sense, a bad day shows your innermost essence more than a good day. It’s not a one-off. You may have actually lost your damn mind.

When I’m having a bad day and I start laughing, you may want to run. For real though, I’ve learned not to confuse people’s bad days as a sign of weakness. I realize that those were the days they were fighting the hardest. Often what feels like a terrible change, is a challenging pathway to a far better place, Hell. You didn’t see that one coming now did you? The thing with Hell is, you’re already in it. Things can’t get any worse. Plus you’ve got Michael Jackson with you for entertainment. Sounds like a win to me.

One day at a time. If you’re having a bad day, remember that you have managed to get through every bad day you’ve had. You’ll make it through this one too. I try to take a day at a time but sometimes several days attack me at once. You have to experience sadness to know happiness. So remind yourself that not every day is going to be a good day, some idiot is going to spill your drink. It’s the way it is. Give the idiot a knock on the head though.

Become a baby. Isn’t it funny how babies laugh a lot? I read that a toddler laughs about 300 times a day. The average adult laughs like 4 times a day in comparison. I haven’t had a good laugh since the summer of 2017. I miss being a kid for real. Every day was a happy day, well except days I had to do the dishes. On the whole, there’s nothing wrong or evil about having a bad day. There’s everything evil about making others have to have it with you.

Don’t be a bastard

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