Riding a Bike

~ Gottfried

Studies have shown that riding a bicycle everyday makes you more awesome than the general population. You’re a disgrace if you can’t swim or ride a bicycle. You get a free pass if you can do at least one. If you’re too heavy for a bike, it’s your cue to put the burger down.

Riding a bicycle is the closest thing to flying. My biggest fear is that when I die my wife will sell my bicycles for what I told her they cost. Ladies, please take out time today to check the cost of a bicycle. It will change your view on then forever. When in doubt, pedal it out.

When in doubt, pedal it out. Give a man a fish and feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and feed him for a lifetime. Teach a man to cycle, and he will realize fishing is stupid and boring. Always remember that you are one ride away from a good mood. Did a cartwheel the other day thinking it was like riding a bike. It’s not.

Cycopath. A person suffering from chronic bike riding disorder and abnormal urges to ride and feel free. Let’s have a moment of silence for all those who are stuck in traffic on the way to the gym to ride stationary bikes. The city needs a car like a fish needs a bicycle.

Bikes are like wives. If it ain’t yours, don’t touch it. Don’t ride it either, unless you’re given permission. Couples who ride together, stay together. Learn to ride a bicycle. You will not regret it if you live. The bruises you get on the way will help you build character. You don’t need a therapist, you need a bike.

Happiness isn’t around the corner. Happiness is the corner! Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you need to keep moving. Four wheels move the body, two wheels move the soul. I don’t ride a bike to add days to my life. I ride a bike to add life to my days.

I cycle because punching people is frowned upon

©️ Gottfried. All rights reserved

56 thoughts on “Riding a Bike”

  7. Lol, My bro who had this own share of this chronic urge for bike riding once stole my pops bike for a feel free ride, only to come back home with a deflated tire and his face full of had I known😅😅

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  8. When riding two wheels is too cumbersome for me I switch to one wheel. Unicycle rock; no chain to deal with, no derailer, no handlebars, and no bike lock needed. Left my unicycle unlocked in downtown Washington DC. No one stoll it because they would look silly walking down the street pushing a unicycle. An woe if anyone should stop them to ask for a demo. Even more embarrassing.

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