The gift that keeps giving

~ Gottfried

Guilt. The gift that keeps giving. When I feel guilty, I drink black coffee. Coffee keeps me going until it is acceptable to drink wine. Christmas is a race to see which gives out first — your money or your feet. It’s beginning to cost a lot like Christmas.

Marriage. Marriage is give and take. You better give it to her or she’ll take it anyway. Don’t you try to hold her accountable for her actions. Women generally aren’t great accountants. To an accountant a spreadsheet is a gift that keeps giving. For women, accountability is getting caught.

Fruitcake. The worst gift is a fruitcake. There is only one fruitcake in the entire world, and people keep sending it to each other. The meaning of your life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away. Your gift, and not your life. Especially if your gift is being able to make fruitcake.

Children. If your children are giving you a headache, follow the directions on the aspirin bottle, especially the part that says, ‘keep away from children’. Whoever established the high road and how high it should be should be fired. Still stressed? Drink wine. Wine flies when you’re having fun.

Friendship. True friendship is the gift that keeps giving. Friendship is being there when someone is feeling low and not being afraid to kick them. Real generosity toward the future lies in giving all to the present. Put all your weight behind the kick! Let them experience it as an expression of your love.

Happiness. It’s not just a gift. It’s giving your soul a lift. Even if you’re on the right track, you will get run over if you just sit there. Don’t let your affection give you an infection. Put some protection on that erection. Happiness doesn’t result from what we get, but what we give.

Put a baby in her today

©️ Gottfried. All rights reserved

44 thoughts on “The gift that keeps giving”

  4. Put a baby in her? Who’s going to bear the cost, considering the recent economic realities, I’d take a cue and put double protection on the erection.

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  6. Oh Dear Lord Mr Gottfried Again

    Right Up my ‘Bowling Alley’

    Another EPiC Day of Giving

    iNdeed Starting in the Wee Hours

    With A Gift of Almost 7 Thousand Words

    on the Wrong Planet Website in that Solo Thread

    of “Depth of The Story” A Few

    Hours of Sleep And Then

    Singing All the Advent

    Songs to Help Lift the
    SPiRiT oF An Often Sort

    Of Dead Church hehe yet
    True God Yes the Choir Director

    Up Front Really Leads that Spirit too
    And Then Off to Public Dance Miles And Miles

    of Store Entertainment All Around the Metro Area

    Literally Providing Smiles for Hundreds Perhaps Even

    Thousands of Folks True Just “Another Day in the Life” of Giving

    As i Continue on in Several More Thousand Words With You Too With

    SMiLes Returning
    As Sure As Waves

    of the Ocean

    Water
    Whole
    Come Again

    Don’t We LiVE iN A
    Wonderful World True of
    Givers With Unlimited Numbers

    of Pretty Birds to Download Online too

    It’s Not Really “Mad Max And The Thunder Dome”

    True It’s More Like “Frankie Goes to Holly Wood Too”

    Just Another Day For So Many Folks to ‘Relax too’

    With All Those Pretty Bird Givers in the World too

    It’s Really Easy for the Giver to Become the

    Receiver These DayS iNDeeD True

    Wow HeaveN ON EartH A Place

    Where Givers Return

    Again Again And

    Again Even When
    They Sleep At Night
    As Their Avatars Carry on
    The Pleasure Dome Even More hehe

    Hey FRiEnD We LiVE iN A WHacKY World Indeed

    Yet It’s All Just First World Problems Over Here

    No One Is Getting Blown Up as Far As i Know
    So Far Tonight

    True Abundance

    Brings LoVE iN Peace

    Yet i Don’t Blame Folks

    For Being A Bit Raw

    For What the

    Rest of the

    World Brings in
    Fear Anger Hate

    And All the Pandemic
    oF iGNoRaNCE AWaY From Peace
    And LoVE Where Folks Put Dusty Old
    Stories Above

    Newer

    ReaLiTiES

    (Stories)

    We
    Co-
    Create

    And Pay
    The Karma
    For Living

    Outside

    oF LoVE iN Peace

    THaT LoVE Is All Ya
    Need iN Peace MeSSaGE

    is the God Dammed Truth iN LiGHT

    Hey Online There Are No ‘Infections’

    Just Steer Around Pandemics oF iGNoRaNCE

    iN Dark LiGHT iT
    All Up God Yes

    Be Free And

    SMiLe Hehe

    Yet i’m Always
    Careful of Taling

    Folks What They Must Do NeW

    THeiR WiLL oR NoT SeeKinG LoVE iN Peace NoW…

    A Measure of True Success mY FRiEnD When Just

    The Pleasure of the Present of YouR Presence
    Along With A SMiLinG Wife is Enough to Create

    Joy and Bliss
    in the Whataburger

    Cashier As She LiTERaLLY

    Jumps for Joy With Glee

    As Soon As We Walk in the

    Door So Glad We aRe HeaR

    Not Everyone Sees me Yet Some Do hehe…

    AcTuAlly HAha Most of them Do They Just
    Pretend They Don’t…

    You Know What
    ‘They’ Say

    Never
    Make Eye Contact
    With A Wild Animal…

    Yet True Beauty’s Aren’t Afraid of Beasts…

    My Wife Calls my SHades my ‘Protection’

    Rather ‘THeir’ Protection As i Pierce THeir Souls

    With
    my
    ‘Lasers…’

    Oh Just So Much
    to Give/Receive..;)

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      1. Hehe Yep 7 Thousand
        Words of Poetic Lyrics

        SPReaDinG All ARounD

        A Globe

        (SuNDaY)

        Free in The Morning

        BRinGinG NeW SinGinG

        To BoRinG Catholic Church

        Then Miles of Public Dance

        Tween BRinGinG

        Innumerable SMiles
        To “Whoville” This

        ‘Roast Beast’ Well
        Done by The Start
        Of Sleep With Another

        3 Thousand Words
        Before “The Sandman”

        Returns Indeed Dear
        Mr Gottfried i Scale

        AWaY All LaYeRS

        OF THiS ONioN

        🧅

        🩸

        SQueeSinG
        Ever Drop

        NeW

        Of
        Blood

        Out Of
        SeeKinG
        LoVE iN
        Peace ✌️☮️ NoW❤️☺️🙏

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply

          1. Indeed Live Long
            Prosper iN LoVE iN
            Peace Dear Mr Gottfried

            Doing my
            Best Always
            To Keep mY
            Hybrid Vulcan

            Well Under
            Control Yes

            May The LiGHT
            Force Be With You

            Keeping A
            Balance

            Of
            DarK
            JusT iN Case
            ✌️☮️❤️ 😈 🙌

            Liked by 1 person

  10. Real generosity toward the future lies in giving all to the present. Put all your weight behind the kick! Let them experience it as an expression of your love.👍

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

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