Grooming

~ Gottfried

Common sense is like deodorant, those that need it the most never used it. Success is a great deodorant, it takes away all your past smells. Keep reaching for the stars. But, please, get a better deodorant. If your deodorant makes you smell worse, it’s not the deodorant, it’s you. It starts with you. 

Winning is a great deodorant. I got a new stick of deodorant today. The instructions said: remove cap and push up bottom. I can barely walk but whenever I fart, the room smells lovely! I wonder how fed up someone had to be to make deodorant. I am sick and tired of people thinking deodorant is optional. 

A bald spot is like a lie. The bigger it gets, the harder it is to cover it up. We seem to believe it is possible to ward off death by following rules of good grooming. The truth is that death is invegitable. At the very least you can delay it for a few more years before dying as a vegetable. Good things happen to those who groom. 

Grooming is ten times more important than makeup. Educational institutions which are grooming grounds for creating responsible citizens have to be kept tobacco and marijuana free. Good grooming is integral and impeccable style is a must. If you don’t look the part, no one will give you time or money. 

Grooming is the secret of real elegance. The best clothes, the most wonderful jewels, the most glamorous beauty don’t count without good grooming. Are you a baddie if you forget to flush every time you use the loo? It’s bad enough to know beautiful women fart, why are you smelling like yesterday?

Success favors the well groomed. Every man should have a magnifying mirror. If you look good magnified, you are set to go. Looking good isn’t self importance, it is self respect. You are your greatest asset. Put your time, effort and money into training, grooming and encouraging your greatest asset. And if at first you don’t succeed…

Keep trying until it kills you.

©️ Gottfried. All rights reserved

44 thoughts on “Grooming”

  1. SMiLes Mr Gottfried i Can’t Contain
    The Rain i Leave An Ocean Behind
    Everywhere i Sweat in Public Dance

    If my Wife Had Her Way She’d Hose
    me Down to Groom me When I Get Home

    A Shower Will Do And We Neither Have a Dog

    Or A Dog
    House
    Abode
    Option too hehe

    Truth Be Told my Wife Takes
    Only Seconds to Get Ready to
    Go Somewhere She Looks Perfectly
    Groomed When She Wakes Up and Even

    When She Snores True the Mirror Will Never

    Suggest She Is
    Less Natural
    Than the
    Fairest
    Groomed Of All

    True i Have to Work
    Harder At presenting
    myself as Less than the Call of the Wild Hehe

    The Young Women at the Dance Hall Always
    Freely Gave me Hugs my Wife Requires Full

    Sanitation
    First if i
    Get That
    Lucky Hehe..:)

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

      1. “I wish the lived by the sea. All that fresh breeze unaffected by sweaty pits”

        First of All Dear Lord Fully 6 Days It’s Taken to Return Yet Better than 7 Hehe

        Even though i could Use a Day of Rest or 8 Days in the Place of 7 Yet That’s

        Just a NuMBeRS
        Game “Does Any
        Body Really Know
        What Time it is”

        Mr Gottfried

        Not Even ‘Chicago’
        If You’ve Heard that Song

        Ah Yes All of Life’s A Stage
        Just a Play and As Shakespeare
        Sadly Lamented About the 7 Decades

        of ‘Man’ Just Withering Away to Nothing

        Perhaps He Never Found Himself as the Beach
        Regenerating Fresh Health With Every Breeze

        (Sadly He Died at 52 Never Even Got a Chance
        Hehe As i Didn’t Even Get Started for Real Until 53)

        True at the Military Gym There is Also No Escape
        From my Ocean of Sweat Although i Do Use Two
        Towels One With Sanitation Sauce and the Other to

        Sit On as i Lift 6 Times my Weight and More 12 Reps Yep 699 Kilograms
        Still Leg Pressing That Way and actually Gaining 40 to 60 Percent
        More Strength With New Modern Technology of Gym Machines that
        the Military

        Recently

        Last December
        Springed For
        my Other Body
        Parts Head to toe
        Free in the Million
        Dollar Gym i Helped
        to Furnish Before i ReTiReD
        Forever Wow to Use the Gym for Free
        Even With 24 Hour Access Now with
        A Retired Department of the Defense ID

        All Programmed

        As such

        to Open
        Automatic
        Doors to the
        Palace of the
        Fountain of Youth

        It’s True Life is Full of Sweaty Pits
        Yet It’s Really Good News as it means

        You Actually Weren’t the Boss’s Son

        And Had to Earn Every God Dammed

        Second of the Fountain of Youth Now

        Never Ending Beach Just Breezing

        Sea Oats Sugar White Sands and
        Emerald Green Gulf Waves Shining

        Through
        Eyes of
        Green
        And
        Blue Bliss

        Spiraling Wings of
        Sugar White Sea Gulls

        Transforming into all
        This Free Dance And

        Song Now True

        Really You Should
        Visit Paradise on the
        Fly The Truth is It’s All
        Within Inside Outside Above
        So Below and All Around a

        Comprehensive

        Play of Life
        Water Waves
        Ocean Whole Tree of Life
        Leaves Continuing to Rise
        Green And Seasonally Fall

        And Feed
        Brown
        ALL
        Year
        Around
        With SMiLes…

        Yes The Adventure
        of A Life-Span Full For Real…

        Most oF it Doesn’t Cost A Penny
        Just A Pound of Sweaty Pits With SMiLes…

        Actually Tons
        Yet Who IS

        Counting hehe…

        Drip…. Drip… Drip….

        How TSuNaMi’s Begin Again…

        In Other Words Also Will Be Seeing You Soon..:)

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply

  5. First, I do not use deo. I use body splash and perfumes. I don’t sweat in my armpits, but my forehead and nose get oily. so I don’t apply oil on my face too. But why this statement “Common sense is like deodorant, those that need it the most never used it”

    And yes, everyone farts, even pretty girls.

    I second you on looking good. It just is a must.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

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