Unfiltered

I told myself I was handsome today. I didn’t argue, I know I’m right. Ladies, some of your selfies are gonna have to stop. Some do the right thing and let the natural beauty shine. The rest of you seem to be using more filters than a coffee pot. Your skin blending into the background. 

You wed the person you cannot live without, not someone you could live with. Together we’re a perfect pair; I talk too much, and you love to stare. You wish to know with whom I am in love? Go back over the first word once again. If you don’t get it, it’s because it’s not you. 

Quit editing your pictures. What if you go missing? How can we find you if you look like Beyoncé in your photos and Chewbacca in real life? Note to self. Just because it pops into my head does not mean it should come out of my mouth. And that’s why I have Banter Republic. 

I have no limits, no filter, no class, no poise. No decorum. Just fun. My frown comes really naturally and doesn’t need anything else to keep it real. I’ve reached the age where my brain went from, “You probably shouldn’t say that” to… “What the hell, let’s see what happens..”

I promise to always be by your side. Or under. Or on top. I adore you with the same fervor that a feral animal adores a trash can. I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile. Then walk into a pole. Love you like a sibling. Which means no filter, full weird. 

Look you want to know what marriage is really like? You wake up, she’s there. You come back from work, she’s there. You fall asleep, she’s there. You eat dinner, she’s there. You know? I mean I know that sounds like a bad thing, but it’s not. She’s just always there. 

Breathing. 

©️ Gottfried. All rights reserved