There are things we’ve seemingly normalized in today’s society and we need to address a few of them because, why not? “The best things in life are free”. No, they’re not!
“I always tell people”. First of all, you don’t always tell me, as a matter of fact, you’ve never told me. Do I look like the people you’ve been telling? There’s no way on God’s green earth you’d tell me stuff like you shit your pants in high school and I’d forget. Absolutely-not-happening!
When people act like they don’t hear you the first time you speak to them, so you have to repeat yourself? Is this a joke to you?
Gottfried: What happened to the cornflakes?
Bayo: Huh!
Gottfried: You heard me!
Bayo: Oh! the cornflakes
Gottfried: No…the corned beef
It’s really rich of you to call out people that think the earth is flat on their stupidity. I’m not saying they aren’t, I’m just saying let people believe in whatever makes them happy. Like Santa Claus, the tooth fairy and peter pan. The earth is flat! No, you say, it’s spherical! It’s also rotating, but can you feel it move? But you believe regardless? Sheep.
People that get upset when you don’t recognize them.
Random old lady: Gottfried! Gottfried!
Gottfried: Err…hi
Random old lady: Gottfried! (Tugs at my cheeks) You don’t recognize me again
Gottfried: Nope
Random old lady: But…but I carried you when you were just a baby…
Gottfried: (Under my breath) No shit Sherlock Holmes, you haven’t aged a day!
When you remove a tick from a dog, you have to show it to the dog? The same happens with humans, but the saying is curiosity killed the cat? Some believe cats are reincarnations of dead grandmothers and I’m inclined to agree. I’m all for having dogs and cats as pets but I can’t quite wrap my head around having a pet hen. You mean we’re just going to allow you pamper some chicken wings? Hot sauce on it.
The absence of evidence is not evidence of absence. Simply because you don’t have evidence that something does exist does not mean you have evidence of something that doesn’t exist. What I’m saying is that there are known knowns and that there are known unknowns. But there are also unknown unknowns; things we don’t know that we don’t know. For instance, you don’t know that you don’t know, you don’t have sense. And that’s facts.
As you keep roaming this planet, it’s pertinent that you search for your one true purpose. Don’t waste all your time trying to become the CEO of a Fortune 500 company when your destiny is to be a groundsman. No debating who lived a more rewarding life...
CEO of course
© Gottfried. All rights reserved.
Preach!!!! 🔥nice work bro
Cheers Debo
I put my bet on the groundsman. The CEO probably committed suicide or died of excess stress long ago!
Haha this is an excellent call! 😁
When I have time (and some days I don’t, for I spend on average, 12-14 hours on research and writing), yours is often the first blog I visit, for I always leave with a smile on my face! Thank you for brightening my day! 😊
Thank you for your kind words Jill. You’ve made my day too 😄😄
That’s quite stressful…”like really ma’am?? i was a baby and could hardly recognize myself and now that i’m all grown…i can’t possible recognize you at a first glance…lol…THIS IS QUITE INTELLIGENT
Lol she thinks you’re a visionary 😂😂
Lmao 😂, me, I have sense oo
Nice write up.. 🤙
I wasn’t expecting less though.
Haha course you do 😁
🤣 🤣 🤣
So you want us to believe that Nobody close to you can tell you you don’t have sense.
😭😭😭😭😂😂😂
Best line “the best things in life are always free” ……nice 😌😌
Haha you sure you read that correctly?
Nice one
Thanks Juwah 😁
Nice article 👍
Thanks Nome
My brother…this is lit.. making sense with so much humor.
Thanks chief 😁
Banter Lord, what do you have for those who never forgets to say “This child that was born just yesterday is now grown”?
Btw, this was another hit. You banter a lot.
Haha true
Nice one.
😁