The Seven Magic Sentences

~ Gottfried

It worked.  “You sure?” to which the response is always, “Yeah damn right I’m sure”. Half the time things work for me, I can’t help but think I’m lucky it worked because I’d have looked really stupid if it didn’t. And if it didn’t work, the only excuse I’d have is that it worked in my head. Everything works out in the end, if it hasn’t worked out yet, then it’s not the end. This doesn’t apply to marriages though, if it’s not working, you should definitely get a fourth wife.

Get out! “What? Are you being serious? I didn’t even see anything!” Sometimes you just need to get out of your own way. I still feel my boss gets a bit dramatic with it when a department is underperforming. Screaming at the top of your lungs won’t dramatically increase productivity. Sometimes just fire a few people, make things interesting. Nobody knows who’s gonna get the boot next. If you don’t get out of your shell, you are just a nut. In a nutshell, if you can’t stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.

Did you take out the trash? “Oh shit”. Ah, I’m sorry mom but the roaches have taken over the kitchen. I had to take out the trash but I never did. It’s the leading cause of arguments between parents and kids these days. One party can’t fathom how the other can live with the stench, the other just doesn’t get why it’s such a big deal. What kids don’t realize is that taking out the trash is a life lesson. It’s why a lot of them still have friends they’re not proud of. It’s never too late to take out the trash unless you live in a bin.

Turn in your paper. As soon as you hear these magic words, your palms become sweaty and your sweat starts to sweat. For some, their brains stop working and they are enveloped by panic. You look down at your script and you know even if your Professor was drunk, there’s still no hope. And then the day comes for the test results to be shared. If your scoresheet is handed to you half folded, you just know that your village people have won, because ain’t no way you did great on the test.

I do. “You do what, drugs?” Whatever I do, I do it because I want to do it and because it’s 100% completely me. I’m not a competitor, I do it strictly for me. Every weekend, I do what I love the most, absolutely nothing. If I tell you I need you, do not take it lightly. I do everything I can to not depend on anyone, to never show weakness.  And if I say that I need you, I am trusting you to catch me if I fall. If your hands are made out of jelly, you just ruined things for the next person.

Get off me. “Dude, we’re wrestling, it’s what I’m supposed to be doing”. Trying to give this lady CPR and she wakes up screaming that she’d much rather die. We live in perilous times. I’d have used a breath mint, but it was 2 in the morning. Maybe if you get off your high horse and stopped thinking the world revolved around you, people would care what you felt. I know I’m a bit crazy, and that’s all part of my charm. If you don’t like it, then get off my unicorn.

Are you hungry? “I’m always hungry”. Rice is great if you’re really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.  Food is a romantic gesture, it is symbolic of love when words are inadequate. If you’ve lost your appetite today, I think I have it. I’m always hungry, or tired, or both. I feel like however I die, my last words are going to be, “But I’m still hungry”. Are you hungry for attention, craving success, longing for intimacy? Be aware of your weaknesses. Bring them to God…

Before satan brings them to you

© Gottfried. All rights reserved

386 thoughts on “The Seven Magic Sentences”

  1. Pingback: The Seven Magic Sentences – Story land

  5. ok. I’m inside.
    how it works depends on whether or not you have understood what gearbox the car has, if you intend to drive a car with an automatic gearbox and you have not yet realized that you have a manual gearbox … this is a problem.
    Needing the other without considering that the other also has needs is like looking in the mirror and talking, believing that the one in front is the only one left in the world.
    Hunger, always be blessed. And the food? Where’s the food? Has anyone seen the food? Hard times, big breaths of air. 😔
    Great article 🎂🙂

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  8. Your mind is more beautiful than you give yourself credit for… Lolss…. This was absolutely lovely. Most relatable for me has to be👇🏼

    “If I tell you I need you, do not take it lightly. I do everything I can to not depend on anyone, to never show weakness. And if I say that I need you, I am trusting you to catch me if I fall. If your hands are made out of jelly, you just ruined things for the next person.”

    Me everyday…. Yet, part of growing up becomes realising that other people have needs too that sometimes makes it difficult for them to hear our SOS through the noise and preconceived barrier of strength WE’ve put up except we speak in a language they can clearly understand. Sadly the world does not revolve around us…. And yeah… A lot of hands are made of jelly. To know this is to avoid spiraling into hurtful limbo. Expect it, and be glad to be shocked if ever.

    The real love and light goes out to those that have to deal with walls they have no idea how they were put up… But then again, they always have the option of walking away.

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    1. Oh stop it, now I’m blushing and I don’t even have the facilities for that 😊

      Getting let down can hurt regardless, even for those of us with hearts made out of reinforced concrete 😆

      Haha, the philosopher jumped out again

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          1. 🤣😂🤣😂 I was wrong – actually thought you might have gotten it from d halloween night … we the people therefore ban you from future black friday sales because we love you and want your heart to be unpolluted!

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  9. LMAO 😂
    Get a fourth wife, really ?? You should break all the Guinness record why only wait till fourth one!
    Fire people, that’s kinda rude in this situation; rather make some people stay in the company that will be more torture than to release them from the pain 😁😁
    Can totally relate to the trash thing. No country is spared! 😅
    And lastly yes food is a romantic gesture! ❤️❤️

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