Being Single

~ Gottfried

I’ve been single for a while now and I have to say that it’s going very well. Like…it’s working out. I think I’m the one. My alone feels so good, I’ll only have you if you’re sweeter than my solitude, which is very rarely the case. The only fun part about being single is how much fun married people mistakenly assume I’m having every weekend. They have no idea both our lives are just as miserable. I believe they slightly edge it.

Being single does not mean you are undesirable or unwanted. It means that you know your worth, and you are waiting for someone that is worthy. Except they never come because you’re undesirable, unwanted and unworthy of love itself. There’s something really cool about knowing that your destiny is so big that you’re not meant to share it with anyone. At least not yet. Never underestimate a persons ability to be unfortunate.

I found out why I’m single. Apparently, you have to go outside and let people see you. I’m telling you right now, yes you reading this. I am single and ready to mingle. But I like being single. I also want attention but the people I’m interested in are blind and can’t see clearly. The ones I don’t like have 20:20 vision. But I’m picky, so it’s back to square one. See my dilemma?

Tempting. Getting in a relationship may look tempting but so was getting on the Titanic Ship and look what happened there. Being single is not easy. You start missing the person you made eye contact with on the street. They say you find love in every corner. My life must be a circle.

My life is like a romantic comedy. Except that there’s no romance and it’s just me laughing at my own jokes. Just because you haven’t found love yet doesn’t mean you will ever find it. Being single for a long period is dangerous. Once you see how peaceful it is, you don’t even want to deal with people anymore.

Advantages of not having a lover. Sleep better. No fear of getting cheated on. Save money and time. Never have to worry about how you look. No missed calls at midnight. No need to recharge twice a day. You can talk to anyone you want for extended periods of time without feeling guilty. No extravagant birthday parties. No guilt feeling of watching a TV series alone. Endless. Limitless.

The smarter the woman is, the more difficult it is to find the right man. Now think about the number of women getting married every Saturday and connect the dots. Smart women end up as rich aunties. Smart men? Are there any? Finally, stay single because why let someone else ruin your life when you’re perfectly capable of doing it on your own. Dating tips?

Don’t

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