Low Battery

~ Gottfried

When life gives you lemons, construct a crude electrochemical battery. If overthinking situations burned calories, I’d be dead. Worrying will be the death of every one of us if we don’t snap out of it. It’s bigger than you, just chill and see what karma comes up with.

I hate leaving home when I don’t have a full battery. The only way to recharge your battery is to eat. Yawning is your body’s way of saying you only have 20% battery remaining. Batteries are the most dramatic object. Other things stop working or they break. But Batteries…they die.

Today I tried to do some work manually. I sat down on the couch and I’m watching TV. It’s hard but it’s necessary. Before I could get the TV to come on, I had a bit of a challenge with the remote. So I hit it hard twice with my palm and it suddenly started to work. So batteries respond to violence?

Phone batteries last longer than relationships these days. I don’t always lose my phone, but when I do, it’s on silent and 5% battery life. Just the perfect conditions necessary for me to begin my futile search. I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, toys not included.

Reading allows me to recharge my batteries. I like my bed more than I like most people. Actually, I don’t like people, I tolerate them. My life is a constant struggle of wanting to go out and have fun with people, while simultaneously trying to avoid all human contact.

Being an introvert doesn’t mean you “hate doing all things.” I came. I saw. I had anxiety, so I left. It just means that your social battery drains very quickly. My mobile phone battery dies all the time because all the messages come straight to me. If only someone could intercept a few of them?

Marriage has no guarantees. If that is what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery. Here’s a parenting hack for you when punishing your kids. Don’t take away their electronics. Just take their charger and watch the fear in their eyes as they use it less and less while the battery slowly dies. You’re welcome!

Brb…need to go plug my phone

©️ Gottfried. All rights reserved.

178 thoughts on “Low Battery”

  1. Pingback: Low Battery – Isa Hôtesse

  2. i have images of you with chem goggles on! Sat in front of a screen with your phone and a energy arch trying to get your phone running of the lemons! Some kind of crazy science experiment! I am a Supernatural, really boring and an eternal hense all the central walking, catchment and masters! My walk is their psych report etc.. works for me! lol (A Doctor of what, funny that i practice from home)

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      1. I am world inc… nothing i did’nt complete, discworld, simpsons savant, disney and chose abstaining therapist and channelling ombusman! Occupational therapy, movies, music,dance masters! outdoor pursuits, FBI, Assad, Vatican and parliament master! equality for all seated Buddhist master! Goddess and infinite supernatural being!

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          1. All inc knowledge not specific we defend the right to all religions and aim only when activation is out of balance or genocidal! We aim by deflection!

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          3. it is not assignment to doctrine just world decleration to set parameter pro good life in the balance or walking either side! My cuffs are world inclusive but usually mean dark seat or tech surgery!

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  4. It’s your fault! When I read, ” Yawning is your body’s way of saying you only have 20% battery remaining,” I automatically started yawning. And now I can’t stop. Time to go back to bed!

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