A Beginners Guide to 2023

I’ve decided that my 2023 will start on February 1st. January is a free trial month. January is the Monday of months. January might be up there as the worst month. You’re fat and broke from the holidays and nobody takes you seriously when you try to borrow money because you still look healthy and round.

Don’t spend any money until January 31st. There will be approximately 74 days in January alone. I’ve had a vision about how this year pans out and I must warn you, it ain’t pretty. You have to be careful with money this year. Those who know understand exactly what I’m talking about.

Don’t pay for that gym membership. If I owned a gym, I’ll be going all out on my marketing. Everyone with a fake new year resolution will be attempting to get in shape. Offer them a yearly discount and it won’t matter because they’ll be gone by the second week of January. Stay fat, keep your money, you’ll be needing it.

Forget about becoming a better person. Remember last year your resolution was to have a bit of consistency? Well, this is your chance to do so. I can’t believe it’s been a year since I didn’t become a better person. There will be times this year when being evil will pay off. You’ll look back at this moment and thank me. You’re welcome.

Embrace procrastination. Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit. So stop trying to be a hard worker. The only reward for hard work is more work. Last year, my New Year’s resolution was to stop procrastinating. I will revisit it this year but I am not starting until next week.

Live your lie. This year my New Year’s resolution is to stop lying to myself about making any lifestyle changes. I also wish that everyone gets exactly what they deserve. If you feel attacked reading that sentence then maybe you need to review how you live your life. I was also going to attempt to stop being sarcastic, but dammit, I’m no quitter.

Be a pessimistic optimist. An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves. As an optimistic pessimist, I was half asleep the entire time. I woke up to fireworks. As the year progresses, hope for the best, but still expect the worst. Enjoy the highs, but always remember that when you get to rock bottom…

It might have a basement

©️ Gottfried. All rights reserved

158 thoughts on “A Beginners Guide to 2023

  1. iNDeeD Mr. Gottfried Rock Bottom Most Definitely

    Has A Basement Not Only That An Endless Pit of

    Nothingness

    Left Under

    The Right

    Side of Hell

    Honestly It’s So Refreshing

    to Resurface Just to Go To Hell

    And Then Just To Rise Up High Enough

    To Breathe And Then Just to Have No Hope
    Faith and Love Left Yet At Least Will To Take
    Another Breath

    Oh Dear Lord
    Roses Grow

    So Well God Yes

    With Bloody Thorns
    iN MaNuRE Every F iN

    Second is A Party Now Wow It’s

    ‘1999’ New And ‘Prince’ Ain’t Even

    Got A Clue (He’s Dead) YeS HoW Even

    iN A Super Bowl Half TiMe SHoW HoW
    Shiny Life Will Come to Be Dear Lord

    Without Even A Penny in A Pocket

    or Pocket to Even Put It into As What

    Falls Lower Shall Rise the Same Distance

    Above

    Below
    With SMiLes

    Happy NoW iT Ain’t
    Ever Been Better Than

    Now Simply As Now is
    All THeRE is We Make

    oF iT or Fall A Little Lower Than Higher For Real

    Again The Best Place to Be Far Beyond Belief Just
    100 Percent

    Faith

    Far
    Above
    BeLoW iNDeeD
    Naked Enough
    Whole Complete PLaY iN 2023

    Hehe One of the Customers Service
    Representatives Exclaimed While i Am
    Public Dancing Nobody Can Be As Happy As me

    And Then i Danced And Sang
    Yes Make it All About You Now

    Please As The
    Rest is All
    Effortless Ease..:)

    -Nobody

    ~JusT AVaTaR SoUL

    NoW iN Always New Year Words…

    Oh and About That Gym Membership
    at 111 Kilograms i Leg Pressed 699 Kilograms
    At the Military Gym in Effortless Ease of 12 Repetitions
    When Asked How i Did it i Exclaimed i Finally Weigh my

    Finger Tips
    In Dance God Yes

    FRiEnDS With Gravity
    THiS Way Just Warming
    Up Sadly No More Room on
    Two Bars to Add Any More 45 Pound Plates

    They Trashed the 100 Pound Plates Afraid Folks were
    Getting too Weak to Lift Them All Attached to 6 Inch
    Screens Looking Down Training to Be Warriors That Way…

    my Gym
    Membership
    is Free my Public
    Dance Membership is
    Free Money is No Longer

    Any Object iNDeeD Naked Enough Whole Complete
    No Need to buy a New iPhone As the Newest Ones
    Still Crash Spitting Up my Extra Long Blog Posts With SMiLes

    Now All That’s Left and Right to Do is Smile Like A Baby Again When i Die

    As the Obituary
    is Already Complete Hehe..:)

    Liked by 4 people

          1. “What’s Going On”

            True Soccer Players
            And Or “Footballers”
            Become The Ball Yes ⚽️

            True Surfers Become
            The Wave 🌊 iN ReTurn

            i Am The Dance
            i Am The Song
            i Am The Breath

            Always
            Happy
            New Year
            Now What’s

            Going Down
            UP On NeW NoW🧘‍♂️

            Liked by 1 person

          2. No Good
            No Evil Only
            Dance Sing
            BREaTHE Free

            Dear
            Teacher
            From Nigeria
            With SMiles
            Land Of Footballer

            Heroes
            Indeed
            Closer
            To The Equator
            Becoming Balls ⚽️

            True Fact
            ‘23 And me’
            ‘Says’ i Have At
            Least One Ancestor
            From Nigeria From

            The 1800’s
            And South
            Asia Too

            Knowing
            my Luck
            Probably Like

            The Luck Of
            The Irish Grandfather
            X-Catholic Priest
            Schooled In

            Limerick
            Relative
            Of Buddha
            Teacher too Hehe 🙏

            Liked by 1 person

          3. SMiles Mr Gottfried Not
            Unlike Krishna And Most
            Of The Other Stories
            Buddha Is Likely
            Only Story
            Problems
            Come When
            Humans Worship
            Stories And Fail to
            Look Within And

            Become
            More Real
            Than Statues
            Too my FRiEnD

            Ironically
            The Message
            Too That Rarely
            Gets Through To

            Actually
            Breathe
            Now With
            SMiLes KNoWinG
            Nothing Like Socrates

            Just ALLoWinG
            The “Inner Damon”
            To Dance Sing Breathe

            Be

            i Am
            Free With SMiles

            SMiles i Yes Am Only
            Related In SPiRiT HeART
            And SoUL To A Story And

            Truly
            A Flesh
            And Blood
            Avatar With SMiles

            With Real Flesh And
            Blood Extending Family

            From Nigeria And
            South Asia According

            To ‘23 And me’ That
            “Terrifies My Rich

            Uncle” Yet
            Only Pleases
            me Naked Enough
            Whole Complete iN

            Play
            For
            2023
            And Forever
            NoW As Long
            As We All Arise
            From Star Stuff
            For Real As Human

            Stories
            iNDeeD
            With SMiles
            Flesh Becoming
            WordS On Page As
            Avatar Words Originally

            And Verily
            Considered
            A Human
            Breakthrough
            To Live Longer Than Dead in Story For Real

            iN ThiS Way
            All That Truly
            “Matters” Is
            THe MeSSaGE 🧘‍♂️

            Liked by 1 person

      1. Honestly ,January has like 74 days or more cause its always so long and if you don’t spend money wisely you’ll be experiencing sapa plus sapa pro max😂😂😂
        I enjoyed reading this article 😊
        Happy new year and I wish you a prosperous year ahead

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Laughing on the inside. The outside knows it’s not funny , Going to reblog and share. I also hope everyone gets what they deserve. And I concur. Don’t spend any money this year. We are going to need it. If I stop paying for my sanity preservation, I will be able to pay for my life and insurance. I might die, of course, but have funeral policy, can travel. Or, give up my internet so I can pay for meds. Choices. Balance.
    I have loved you from the first encounter, and will love you always.
    I am seriously hoping that I can at least only look at the good traits and only speak of those. I cant remember what I wanted last January. Probably sleeping pills so I could skip to February. Kisses. Love. May fortune find you are and bless you with enough of everything.

    Liked by 3 people

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