Excerpts from real-life events. This time I’m traveling. On one of my many cross country trips and as cupid would have it, I’m seated in the back, next to two other passengers, a young man and fair lady with skin like milk.
I had loaded my belly full with rice so I was prepped to sleep for as long as the good Lord would let me, but my ears had other plans. A few minutes in, she turns to my direction and asks if I have an extra earpiece since I’m blaring music loudly in my ear, I nod in disapproval and look away.
I miss the look of disgust on her face as she turns to the other guy who obliges, even offers to share the earpiece with her as they both settle for her “girl power” kind of music. Katy Perry for the win. I look at them and scoff to myself. “Kids”
After a while, the guy and the girl start talking. I overhear him ask her how old she was, but she wouldn’t give him a straightforward answer. Instead, she hit him with the age-old conversation killer, “guess”. In my mind I’m like if you bother guessing you’re an idiot, but what do I know? Right?
Time passes and we keep making stops because some people can’t hold their bladder. At this point, the driver is fed up and warns that he won’t be stopping anymore. Guess who’s luck ran out? No not me, I barely drink water on a trip. Mr lover boy over here needed to pee.
For some reason, they decide against getting the driver to stop and he’s doing his best to “be a man”. Tears are starting to well up in his eyes, so as a gentleman I offer him an empty can to pee in. He looks at me with eyes like “you must think I’m not very smart”. I was right.
He took the can and gestured to the girl to look away while he attempted to channel his energy into making an accurate shot. Such a shame, he’s shooting was off, and not only did he miss the can altogether, but I’m also convinced he definitely peed on her legs. She’s livid! I’m amused! The entire back seat is smelling like a urinary. God is great
The guy starts to apologize profusely. “It was not intentional, it spilled”. She’s not having any of it. I think to myself, today couldn’t get any better now, could it? I close my eyes and try to reconnect with my nap when I’m awoken to the bus swerving from one end of the road to the other. Apparently, the driver was napping too.
On the upside, following the drivers’ shenanigans, the two love birds find themselves in an embrace. The guy looks girl dead in the eye, offers a sincere apology and all is forgiven. All this time, people are hopping off at different stops. I get to my stop, convinced that once again, the universe has aligned. Hop down, open the boot to pick my bag and…It’s gone
Some idiot picked my luggage
Β© Gottfried. All rights reserved.
The new owner of your luggage probably said the same thing (God is great). Too bad for you though. I hope you didn’t have anything too valuable in it. That would be beyond annoying. I wonder what you could have done to prevent that from happening. Not much, I guess….
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Hahaha can’t believe you’re laughing at my pain.
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Not really laughing … well, maybe just a tiny bit, but I can imagine you’d be pretty pissed off to find your luggage stolen. I would be really upset.
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Indeed it was a bunch of old clothes, I do suspect it was taken in error. Nobody wants those π€
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I hope whoever took them is very disappointed.
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Yup yup π
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Hahaha. Best part is where the guy did his thing on her legs. My imaginations immediately go into overdrive! When he spilled it, I’m sure his equipment was still out in the open. The guy must have had a hard time balancing his apologies with not letting his dignity get dragged in the mud….
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ππππππ I’m gone
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Hahaha…he should be thankful his didn’t get a slam on Dignity!!!
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πππ
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Oh my!! This is getting too graphic . ππ. Let’s not go about imagining things π
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Lol guy π
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Just found out there were typos and not *he or *his t’was Di…
Actually I meant to say *Dicnity
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π π π
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π€£π€£π€£π€£
Funny man. Shit happens but not always. You must also be lucky that you weren’t stolen too. Nice piece
Congrats to the two love birds βοΈ
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Haha thanks man.
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Why won’t someone take your luggage when you were concentrating on other things. Good for you.
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Whose side are you on π
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Hope you were reunited with your luggage eventually???
Lieve
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Sadly no π
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That’s awful… Next time: travel lightly.
Lieve
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I’m taking your word for it π
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Interesting episode… I’d be pretty pissed off if a guy spilled pee on meπ
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All is fair in love and war
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And you asked me for advice on how to blog? God is good, and so are you.
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Thank you so much Cindy β€π
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When it comes to love, everything is a win.
But can’t be me anywaysπ
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I hope your boyfriend knows about this π
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ππ
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π
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Next time you look at the boot when passengers drop from the bus… now your bag is gone
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My brother, wetin Musa no go see for Lagos?
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Haha interesting episode thank God you got to your destination before the driver continues his nap.
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I’m wondering why he didn’t even take permission. The nerve of that guy π
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Ntoiiiiinπ! You should have let him be a man in peace.
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πππ
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Why the hell am I supposed to have an extra earpiece? π
This is episode is relatable π
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In case the bass in the first earpiece isn’t hitting hard enough π
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“Someone took your luggage”, are you sure? Because knowing you, it’s possible you didn’t put your luggage in the vehicle. Legend has it that an unidentified luggage was left behind and still at that park till date.
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Lmao you might not be too far from the truth πππ
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