The Superior Gender

~ Gottfried

Gender is between your ears, not between your legs. I think women are foolish to think they are equal to men. They are far superior and always have been. Besides to be better than a man takes very little. The bar is underneath the ground. Women speak because they wish to speak, whereas a man speaks only when driven to speak by something outside himself-like, for instance, he can’t find any clean socks. Make no mistake though, man are, and will always be, the prize.

Learn the difference between a woman and a girl. Same gender, different breed. Girls like ice cream, women like wine and actually rub cream. Girls are sweet and innocent, women are manipulative and generally guilty. It’s no wonder most men prefer to marry their childhood sweetheart. If you’re lucky, she’ll share her wine with you and not manipulate you all the time. It may be a man’s world, but men are easily controlled by women.

A woman’s place is in the kitchen. Unfortunately, that’s also where all the knives are kept. Gender roles are absolute nonsense. ‘Because you are a girl’ is never any reason for anything ever. Ever. Now wake up from your slumber and go find a job as a waitress or something. There’s no such thing as beauty sleep sweetheart. I would rather trust a woman’s instinct than a man’s reason.

Introspection. A quiet man is a thinking man. A quiet woman is usually mad. Men want peace and quiet. Women do everything in their power to either be the peace or ensure that there is no peace. When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. It’s a whole different way of thinking. As long as she thinks of a man, nobody objects to a woman thinking. A woman’s guess is much more accurate than a man’s certainty.

Better aim. Women do what they want, Men do what they can. Women are better in the area of keeping the bathroom clean, and it’s only because they have a garbage aim so they are forced to sit down. When you’re operating sophisticated machinery such as men do, you’re allowed to gamble a bit. Dear men, our aim is to keep the bathroom clean. Your aim will help.

Men are lunatics, women are idiots. Women tend to fall in love in a man’s presence. Men tend to realize they are in love in the woman’s absence. Here’s all you need to know about men and women. Women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid. Also, women are stupid. Dogs aren’t left out either. Men are dogs. Women are cats. As has been long observed, men are people, but women are women.

Make a difference. To make a difference in this world as a man, you have to do the unthinkable! You have to invent something or make a major discovery. Even turn water into wine! For the woman, all you have to do is something brave like shave your head. Men have to be the best dancers or richest looking guys at a party. As a lady, if you wear a short enough skirt, the party will come to you.

Mistakes. When women survive an awful marriage or love affair, they generally avoid another relationship for quite some time. With men, however, it is just the opposite. The moment they finish a catastrophe they start looking for another one. It’s almost as if they heal faster. Or don’t heal at all. With all the evidence thus provided, the superior gender is…

not women

©️ Gottfried. All rights reserved

352 thoughts on “The Superior Gender”

  1. The number one rule around our house is, “If momma ain’t happy, there ain’t no one happy.” Things seem to work out better if everyone remembers that.

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