It all started with a big bang. But no one asks, who set it off? In my mind’s eye, I picture the big man set off a hand grenade and throw it into space and bang! galaxies! The milky way! Serious question marks over who named it milky way, there’s quite literally no milk. But that’s not the point, the question is, was it an accident?
Growing up, I used to be a bit of a hothead. There was this girl in my class known for running her mouth. She would run you down at the slightest provocation and it was gradually becoming a reputation of hers. On this particular day, she came for me, and my ears. Talking about “Why do Gottfried’s ears look like mug handles?” Now I wasn’t going to react, but another guy went, “yeah, I see it too” Now I was pissed
I tell her really calmly, “stop saying that, leave me alone”. But she wouldn’t listen and went ahead to say it one more time. This time the entire class hears and is thrown into fits of laughter. So I react sharply, you know, to shut her mouth. As my palm connects with her left cheek, I immediately realized why my dad warned me to never hit anyone. My excuse? It was an accident! Her cheek connected with my palm! Premeditated? maybe, but an accident regardless. Would I do it again? Absolutely!
Driving. Driving, in general, is an extreme sport. For some cities, you need to be on the edge or you won’t get anywhere. You also have to master the dark art of keeping your emotions in check. A fine gentleman learned the hard way as I watched him, in a hurry, park very carefully inside a gutter. You should see the look on his face as he crawled out of the passenger’s side. The look on my face? Delighted!
Unplanned kids. I wonder if twins realize that one of them was, in fact, an accident. Here’s a pro tip to know if you’re an accident. If your first birthday wasn’t hugely celebrated, I’ve got news for you. Also, if management was going through a financial crisis and you arrived to add to their troubles, you might wanna sit this one out.
Sometimes the root cause of your ‘accident’ isn’t even you. It could be any/or a combination of poor timing, sheer ill-luck, and good old foolishness. You almost have a sixth sense about what’s coming, but you ignore.
And when it does happen, when shit really hits the fan, the events of the day start replaying before you, this time, in slow-mo. You can almost taste the foolishness on your lips. If it could get worse, it definitely will!
Loving. Accidents ambush the unsuspecting, often violently, just like love. It’s usually the ones who swear that their heart is made out of reinforced concrete that falls helplessly in love. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving.
You see where I’m going with this? Yes? Therefore, to love is to suffer; not to love is to suffer; to suffer is to suffer. To be happy, then, is to suffer, but suffering makes one unhappy. Therefore, to be happy one must love or love to suffer or suffer from too much happiness.
And so my dear friend, as you waltz through this divide of eternity called life, know this for certain. There is no such thing as an accident.
It is fate unnamed.
Omg! Finally I found someone who has mug handles in place of ears, just like me!!!
Why do bad things happen to good people?π
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Haha it’s just how the world goes π
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So funny,May God forgive you,I know for certain if you are giving the chance to talk in heaven, you will talk yourself into Paradise.
So therefore don’t even think you will be given to chance to talk in heaven.to whom much is giving, much is also expected.
Considered this an eternal info.
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Haha, talking myself into paradise will take some doing
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But the gift is there..
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Thank you π
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Your ears thoughπππππππππ. You deserved itπ
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I dey accidentally connect with people face oh ππ
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I do not like this piece because it’s soo really. We could actually avoid some of these accidents by not letting our emotions rule.
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Letting our emotions rule is the single distinctive difference between us and the machines π
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Thanks for sharing
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You’re welcome
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Most humourous of lot.loved it
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Thanks man!
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“Her cheek connected with my palm! Premeditated?”
love this! and the last lines about loving and stuff had me simultaneously crying on the inside and laughing… xD!
great post, mr. g
(can i call you mr. g?)
love always,
[gotw}
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Haha, shame it won’t fly in court.
Feel free to call me that βΊοΈ
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fly in court?
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Her cheek connecting with my palm, as opposed to slapping her…
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…i thought they were the same thing?
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They are. Court would favor the lady though
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i see.
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Yes please!
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β‘ We Did
…β‘β‘β‘…
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Glad you did
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Jeez!! Another fantastic work! Suffering is a part of our life or is suffering our life? As far as love is concerned Iβm a hopeless romantic. Have been rejected multiple times but for some reason I try to find love again and again.π€£π€£
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To suffer is to suffer π
You must really love love. Maybe not the people you’ve been with. You just like the idea of being in love.
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Maybe. Iβm not really sure. Itβs like I see couples all the time and how much they care for each other, sacrifice a lot and have immense trust. Wait..this is self pity right?π€£
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Haha it’s not self pity. It’s just something you crave. And maybe if the universe loves you, it’ll happen for you too
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Yeah crave is the right word. And I hope the universe would love me someday(dk about love but now even my English teacher hates me for starting the sentence by using βandβ)
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Haha, she’ll be absolutely livid.
I hope you find it though. Personally think finding yourself is more important. But what do I know βΊ
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Aah yes that is more important..! Finding myself and divorcing self hatred
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Your dark humour really caught me π enjoyed reading this post!!
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Thank you sweetie. You should check the others, there’s plenty more where this came from π
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Well, I’m confused now. Am I supposed to be happy or am I supposed to suffer?
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haha, think Das. Think π
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After reading that tongue twisting happy-suffer part, I feel like one will suffer either way.
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haha, exactly!
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π€
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ππ
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π
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